


That's What She Said

by thequidditchpitch_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Erotica, Explicit Sexual Content, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, The Quidditch Pitch: More Than Two, Twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-01-20
Updated: 2006-01-20
Packaged: 2018-10-27 10:58:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10807698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thequidditchpitch_archivist/pseuds/thequidditchpitch_archivist
Summary: It's been five years since Hermione last saw the twins, and she definitely likes what she sees.





	That's What She Said

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Annie, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Quidditch Pitch](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Quidditch_Pitch), which went offline in 2015 when the hosting expired, at a time I was not able to renew it. I contacted Open Doors, hoping to preserve the archive using an old backup, and began importing these works as an Open Doors-approved project in April 2017. Open Doors e-mailed all authors about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Quidditch Pitch collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thequidditchpitch/profile).

  
Author's notes:

slash, het, twincest (hee!), dirty talk, voyeurism, masturbation, nonexistence of plot, slight crack, possible reincarnation of the author's fantasy

written for [](http://www.livejournal.com/userinfo.bml?user=xxrubyxsohoxx)[**xxrubyxsohoxx**](http://xxrubyxsohoxx.livejournal.com/)'s birthday, and for my own sanity. Vaguely inspired by [this beautiful piece of art](http://www.livejournal.com/users/lizardspots/160212.html#cutid1) by [](http://www.livejournal.com/userinfo.bml?user=lizardspots)[**lizardspots**](http://lizardspots.livejournal.com/), and of course, the equally as beautiful [Madden twins](http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y168/hailiebu/ec4426b0.jpg). Thanks to [](http://www.livejournal.com/userinfo.bml?user=eckerlilas)[](http://eckerlilas.livejournal.com/)**eckerlilas** for the beta! ♥  
 

* * *

"Watch it, Fred! You're going to poke my eye out!"  
  
"That's what _she_ said."  
  
The joint sniggering echoed throughout the flat as Hermione Granger Apparated nervously into the main room. Molly Weasley had assured her that the twins were expecting her arrival, and therefore to Apparate directly into their flat as opposed to waiting for them to buzz her up and then walking up fifteen flights of stairs.  
  
She cautiously crept across the atrocious shag carpet in the direction that the voices were coming from, wondering if it would be considered inappropriate for her to sneak up on them and surprise them after all this time. She'd been working out of the country for the past five years with little contact with the rest of the Wizarding World, due to the secrecy of her mission. From what she'd heard from Molly and Ginny in the past few days since her return, however, the twins had changed considerably.  
  
Following the sounds down the hallway towards the bathroom, she caught sight of them through the open door and nearly dropped her wand. The flaming red hair and freckled skin certainly proved they were in fact Fred and George Weasley, but that's where the similarities to the twins she used to know ended. They were both clad in sleeveless black t-shirts with Muggle bands she had never heard of scrawled across the fronts. The first thing she noticed was that the freckles on their arms were joined by colorful portraits of assorted words and pictures, completely different except for the matching three interlocking W's on their left shoulders.  
  
Hermione lifted her eyes to the mirror above the sink, where the reflections of both twins' faces caused her to barely recognize them. Even after all this time, she could still tell them apart, especially with the plethora of metal piercings adorning their faces. Both of them had earrings in both ears, but Fred simply had a barbell in his eyebrow while George had two lip rings and a labret stud. Their hair was styled the same way, though, in a sort of faux-hawk. And they were currently in the process of putting on _eyeliner_.  
  
She was about to announce her presence when Fred let the eyeliner pen fall from his fingers and shoved George rather forcefully against the sink, claiming his mouth in a _very_ un-brotherly kiss. Hermione gasped and immediately covered her mouth with her hand, wide-eyed in disbelief at the sight before her.  
  
Fred abruptly broke the kiss and stared into his brother's eyes. "You look so fucking hot in eyeliner."  
  
"As do you," George replied, wrapping his arms around Fred's back to pull him closer. "Think we have time for a quickie before 'Mione gets here?"  
  
"Let 'er watch," Fred said roughly before capturing his twin's lips again, running his tongue along the piercings. "I think she'd enjoy watching me fuck you into the counter, my cock buried deep in your arse while you make those adorable scrunchy faces over my shoulder. Listening to the sound of my balls slapping against your arse as you scratch your nails down my back, _begging_ me to touch your cock."  
  
" _Fuck_ , Fred," George rasped, lowering his hands to knead the flesh of his brother's arse. "That would be so hot."  
  
Fred planted wet kisses down George's jaw line, settling on a sensitive spot right behind his twin's ear. "Or I could _not_ touch you and save your aching hard cock for _her_. I bet she'd be so wet from watching us, and she could straddle you on the counter and ride you while I fuck your arse. I'd reach around her and squeeze her tits and finger her clit until she clamps her muscles around your cock so tight that you can barely move."  
  
"Such a filthy mouth," said George, groaning deeply as Fred sucked on his earlobe and flicked the piercing with his tongue. "You should put it to good use."  
  
"Should I?" Fred pulled away far enough to look into his twin's eyes and smirked. "You want my mouth on you? _In_ you? You want me to finger your arse while you fuck my face with your cock?"  
  
"Mmm, yes please." George smiled sinfully as he hopped up onto the counter; brown eyes locked together as Fred lifted up his twin's shirt and dipped his head to taste the skin right above his waistline.  
  
Hermione could see the bulge straining from George's bondage pants as Fred continued downward to press his lips against his erection through the fabric. George tossed his head back, nearly smacking it against the mirror, and brought a hand up from the edge of the counter to twist in his brother's hair.  
  
"You're going to fuck up my 'hawk," Fred mumbled into George's crotch, his fingers idly working open the buttons.  
  
"I'll fix it," said George breathlessly. "Later."  
  
Fred grinned wickedly as he lowered the zipper with his teeth. George lifted himself up so that Fred could remove the offending clothing completely, tossing it carelessly aside. Hermione couldn't stop her hand from slipping inside her robes when she saw yet another piercing on the head of George's cock, and she bit her lip to keep from crying out as her fingers trailed down her stomach and into her knickers.  
  
Flicking the piercing with his tongue, Fred swallowed the head of his brother's cock into his mouth, sucking it noisily in and out. George groaned and bucked his hips forward, encouraging Fred to take in more of his length. Fred wasn't having it, though, and clamped a hand firmly on George's hip to hold him still as his other hand fumbled with the buttons on his own bondage pants.  
  
" _Fuck_ ," George hissed. "Bloody cocktease."  
  
Fred grinned around his mouthful of cock, adding two fingers of his free hand. After they were properly coated with saliva, he trailed them down the underside of George's cock, around his balls, and rubbed tiny circles around the puckered hole of George's entrance.  
  
Hermione had to lean back against the wall as she stroked her swollen clit, barely aware that her knickers were completely soaked and her juices were starting to trickle down her thighs. Bucking wildly against her hand, she tasted blood on her lip as she bit back her moans, trying with every ounce of energy she possessed to keep her eyes trained on the twins.  
  
Fred's fingers disappeared inside George and George spread his legs to wrap around Fred's shoulders as Fred finally gave in and swallowed his twin's cock in its entirety. Grabbing a fistful of Fred's hair, George arched his back and growled from deep in his throat. Hermione couldn't keep the choked sigh from escaping her lungs as she came with him, slinking down to the floor in a shaky pile of limbs.  
  
She looked up to see both twins staring at her hungrily with black-lined eyes, George's limp cock resting on Fred's lips.  
  
"Told you she'd like watching us," Fred said in a low voice, raising his body up to position his own cock between his brother's legs. "You want to watch me fuck him, Hermione?"  
  
Nodding weakly, Hermione forced her vision to focus clearly and inhaled sharply.  
  
In one swift motion, Fred attached his mouth to George's and lifted his legs over his shoulders, sheathing his cock inside his brother's arse. Hermione could see perfectly as it thrust in and out, both twins swallowing each other's groans and embracing each other fully. She pressed two fingers inside her heat and curved them upwards, moving them as fast as she could until another orgasm swept over her.  
  
Fred tore his mouth away from George's and turned to face Hermione with hooded lids and kiss-swollen lips. "How long have you been there, Hermione? Did you hear everything we wanted to do to you?"  
  
"Yes." The certainty of her voice surprised her, and her body moved of its own accord as she carefully stood up and walked through the doorway of the bathroom.  
  
George leaned back as far as he could on the counter as Fred did the same in the other direction, pulling out of his brother. George's cock had hardened again and was now bobbing invitingly before Hermione's eyes, and she couldn't resist reaching out to touch the piercing.  
  
" _Mmm_ ," George groaned appreciatively, reaching out to grasp Hermione's arm and pull her towards him. "Best thing I ever did, that piercing. You want to feel it inside you?"  
  
Hermione emitted a sort of choked sigh and nodded again, rushing to fling off her robes and other clothing as the twins watched her lustfully. Once she was nude, Fred lifted her up on the counter with her thighs on either side of George, hovering over him.  
  
"Fuck me, Hermione," George said huskily, raising his head to kiss her. She felt his piercings against her lip and gasped into his mouth as she lowered herself onto his cock. He slid inside her easily, his piercing rubbing against her inner walls until she had taken all of him in. Fred's arms were around her instantly, coaxing her body back towards him as he returned his cock to his twin's arse, placing a hand on Hermione's hips to establish a rhythm.  
  
Hermione arched back against Fred as she was filled over and over again by George, closing her eyes to the incredible sensations of Fred's mouth on the back of her neck and Fred's hand roaming aimlessly around her chest. George reached his own hand up to join his brother's, and both twins teased at her nipples as George's piercing hit her g-spot and made her cry out yet again.  
  
Fred grunted into her ear, his balls slapping against George's arse as he thrust in and out. She peeked open an eye to see George's bright-red face scrunched up adorably just like Fred had said it would, chewing on a lip ring with sporadic breath. She felt his hand tighten on her breast as Fred quickened his pace behind her, and Fred squeezed her firmly as they both screamed out each other's names. Hermione was pushed down on top of George as Fred collapsed onto her back, and both twins began kissing any piece of skin they could find.  
  
"I feel like a sandwich," Hermione mumbled into George's shoulder.  
  
Fred snorted. "That's what _she_ said."  



End file.
